What have I done? I’m sitting at my desk, looking at a furiously flapping pigeon that I didn’t think would live through the night.
What have I done? I’m sitting at my desk, looking at a furiously flapping pigeon that I didn’t think would live through the night. I found him on the shoulder of Beach Road, near Big Bridge, the victim of a hit and run. I thought he was dead. After a fleeting moment of sadness, I told myself, “It’s only a pigeon.”
Then out of the corner of my eye I saw him raise his head.
I brought him home figuring I could at least spare him a slow death from hypothermia, starvation, dehydration and/or being picked apart by crows. At least I could give him a comfortable final night and a peaceful passing. But Walter — so named by my movie buff mother — rallied and now was desperately trying to fly out of the pen I had improvised out of a clear storage bin and bath towels.
I was having rescuer’s remorse. I knew nothing about pigeons, much less what to do with an injured one. Walter was in rough shape — his left leg was lifeless, his left wing was badly injured and abrasions covered his chest. Surgery wasn’t in my lockdown budget even if I could find an Island veterinarian to operate.
I set him down on my outdoor deck to see if he could take flight. It was instantly clear he couldn’t. It was gut wrenching to see the poor guy valiantly try to push himself up with his beak. The more he tried the more his frustration grew. In no time, three large crows gathered on tree branches above with Walter in their sights.
I picked him up and he immediately calmed, just like he did when I plucked him from the side of the road. Walter was a trusting soul.
I tried to find local rescue options but I struck out. By the end of Day 1 it was clear Walter’s life was in my hands. I had to step up.
When I was a kid my first career choice was veterinarian, but math and an allergy to cats had quickly squashed that dream. But now, after getting my veterinarian degree from YouTube U., I was able to splint his wing with special tape I’d used on my late dog Mona that doesn’t stick to fur or feathers. Walter never pecked at me, not even during my clumsy attempts at triage. Thankfully, he showed no outward signs of pain. Although he didn’t eat the night before, he was now devouring seed and chugging water.
Walter wanted to live. I was all in.
Walter the pigeon
Walter the pigeon
Day 2 with Walter was the one warm day we had in April. We sat on my deck and took in the sun. I’d never looked closely at a pigeon before. Why would I? They were only pigeons.
His neck and hackles flickered with purple and green iridescence. His eyes were two concentric shades of orange with black pupils. His wings had geometric patterns of black, gray and white, subtly mottled with mocha spots. He was a beautiful animal. And surprisingly soft.
Walter had personality. When I petted his head with my thumb, he closed his eyes, savoring every stroke. He looked at me with an inquisitive cock of his head when I talked to him. He was a good listener. He didn’t judge.
He liked to be held. He laid on his back and never stirred while I worked on his wee red leg. The only time he made a fuss was when I put him in his pen. He hated it. He always tried to escape. Concerned he’d make his injuries worse and eliminate whatever long odds he had to recover, I began to take him with me. We became inseparable.
He sat in my lap while I watched a movie and on my desk while I worked. I dug out a baby sling I used to carry Mona on walks during her last days and brought Walter on my daily sanity hikes. He was skittish at first. It can’t be easy for a bird used to gliding smoothly through the air at 50 miles an hour to adjust to the lumbering gait of a galoot with bad knees. But he quickly settled in. The only time he wigged out was when I walked on the Sengekontacket shoreline, directly across the pond from Big Bridge. Since pigeons can find their way home from 1,000 miles away, I have no doubt Walter knew he was in his old ‘hood.
Walter didn’t mind being in his pen when it was in a moving vehicle so we ran errands together. He relaxed in the crook of my non-drinking arm when I went to a socially distanced happy hour at the Masonic Lodge parking lot. Walter liked to hang with the boys.
He had eclectic taste in music, visibly perking up to the Ramones, Sly and the Family Stone and Beethoven’s 7th symphony. When a friend came by for a socially distanced outdoor visit, Walter followed our conversation like a spectator at a tennis match.
Soon, he developed a following.
By Day 3, “How’s Walter?” became the opening to every conversation and email I had with family and friends. It was a welcome respite from trying to come up with an interesting answer to “How are you?” after six weeks of grinding repetition. When I went down the rabbit hole of pigeon research, I found one surprise after another. It turns out pigeons are doves with bad P.R. Pigeon is the French word, dove the Nordic word, for the same bird, but chances are you’ll never find a soap or ice cream bar named “Pigeon.”
Pigeons are the world’s oldest domesticated bird — they appear on 5,000-year-old Mesopotamian tablets. Ancient Greeks used pigeons to send the results of Olympic Games from town to town, which is why they’re released at the opening ceremonies of the modern games.
Charles Darwin studied pigeons as he formulated the theory of evolution. He grew so emotionally attached to them that he stopped killing them for dissection purposes.
In the First and Second World Wars, pigeons saved thousands of human lives. They were kept on ships in North Atlantic convoys and if a U-boat attacked, a pigeon was released with details of the location of the sinking ship. In the World War II pigeons relayed information about German V1 and V2 rocket sites.
Project Sea Hunt, a US Coast Guard search and rescue experiment in the 1970’s, showed pigeons are more effective than humans in spotting shipwreck victims at sea.
They’re also excellent athletes. Pigeons can fly at altitudes beyond 6,000 feet at an average speed of 78 mph. B. F. Skinner, one of the most influential American psychologists, even taught pigeons to play ping pong. Check YouTube if you need confirmation.
And they are incredibly smart. Recent studies have shown they make top notch radiologists. They have the ability to distinguish benign from malignant human breast tumors, averaging 87 per cent correct scores.
In a remarkable bit of kismet, a study was released on Day 4 with Walter that showed, contrary to popular belief, New England-based pigeons do not interbreed with pigeons from the rest of the East Coast. The genetic makeup of East Coast pigeons changes in Connecticut, roughly at the same boundary that separates Red Sox and Yankee fans. Walter was one of us.
My respect and affection for him grew by the minute. But a decision had to be made. I couldn’t keep toting him around, especially when lockdown was over and I emerged from hibernation. I wondered what I’d want if I were Walter. It wouldn’t be living half my life in a converted storage bin. I thought about asking a farmer friend who butchers poultry if she’d give him a swift and merciful ending. God knows I couldn’t do it.
When I read that it takes 10 days for a splinted wing to heal, I made a plan. I’d love nothing more than to see Walter take flight but if he couldn’t fly after 10 days, I’d find a vet to humanely put him down.
Then, on Day 5, providence intervened in the form of a fundraising email from the New England Wildlife Center (NEWC) in Weymouth. NEWC is an impressive operation, housed in an $8 million, 22,000-square-foot facility. Dr. Greg Mertz, the “Odd Pet Vet” has operated on over 100,000 wild animals, 230 species of wildlife, and 100 exotic pets. If there was one place that could fix Walter, this was it. I went to the website pumped that we had a miracle in the making. I told Walter he might fly again after all. But the center was closed due to the pandemic. I called anyway and left a voicemail just in case.
Walter took the news well. We had dinner and watched Reservoir Dogs. Turns out he’s a Tarantino fan.
On Day 6, I got a call from Harry, an upbeat lad who said NEWC could indeed take Walter.
“I’m living here all week so just ring the bell when you get here,” he said.
I spent my last night with Walter watching Pulp Fiction. He fell asleep in my lap.
When we arrived at NEWC, Harry explained the socially distanced drop-off procedure over the phone. I petted Walter goodbye, put him in a small cage in the lobby, left a donation and drove away, satisfied I’d done everything I could for Walter.
I didn’t hear from the center that day. Or the next. I emailed, I called. Nothing. Finally, I got an email from Dr. Mertz. Walter had been euthanized. He had a fractured pelvis and other irreparable injuries.
“But, humanely he went,” Dr. Mertz wrote.
For the most part, I had fared pretty well since lockdown began. As a writer and a closet misanthrope, I’d already been socially distancing for years. With a roof over my head and food in my cupboard I was in better shape than a lot of people. But the day I found Walter I was in a deep funk. After six weeks of solitude, I’d hit bottom. The hardest part of living alone is the unmistakable stillness in the air. You can fill silence with music, but the stillness — the stark absence of another sentient being — remains.
In recent years, my partner Jennifer and my dogs Angus and Mona had all died. The presence of their absence got heavier each day. It was like losing them all over again. Even though time had worked some of its healing magic, when Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here came on the radio, I was suddenly a mess. A kiss, a handshake, a lick from a dog seems like a quaint tradition from the distant past. I have no idea when I’ll hug someone again.
But for six days, Walter made me forget about all that. I got to wish him good morning, to hear him peck at seed and to feel his heartbeat in my hands. Walter broke the stillness. He pulled me out of my funk. He was a gift. Even though he was just a pigeon.
Donations to the New England Wildlife Center can be made at newildlife.org.
Barry Stringfellow lives in Edgartown.
Comments
What a beautiful tale
JbWhat a beautiful tale
Best thing I’ve read in ages.
AM 02539Best thing I’ve read in ages. Sounds like a great six days.
Loved it!
AWNLoved it!
An endearing tale
Gabrielle West TisburyAn endearing tale
Love this.
EmLove this.
We all needed your story . I
Janice EdgartownWe all needed your story . I learned so much about pigeons and love . I’ll not look at them the same way again . Thank you Barry
Thank you, Barry. Thank you
Kathy MacDonald Chappy & CarlisleThank you, Barry. Thank you,Walter. What a gifted story-teller you are, Barry, with your humanity and caring coming through so powerfully to connect us all, in some small yet remarkable way. Thank you.
Pigeons are wonderful
Henry and Ingrid Casas ConnecticutPigeons are wonderful creatures, we currently have 4 of them, all but one fly well but cannot be released because they wouldn’t be able to live outside any more. So, they go with us together with 3 cats, one stray and two feral. We have a camper and we go only to places we can take the whole family together. We have no children, our only Daughter perish in a car accident when she was only 15, so the found animals are our family.God bless you Barry! Henry & Ingrid (PS: we are licensed Rehabbers by CT now)
Thanks for the beautiful
Elisa Speranza New OrleansThanks for the beautiful story. I love that you were able to determine Walter was a Red Sox fan. Sounds like you need to adopt a rescue dog now. All the best to you during these crazy times.
I loved this story. Thank you
Mary Alsop Guilford CTI loved this story. Thank you so much Barry.
I know of two sweet cats at
Gayle Vineyard HavenI know of two sweet cats at the Edgartown shelter who could use a special person like you. Just ask for Angus and Hazel.
So sweet! You obviously have
Virginia Leussler North ReadingSo sweet! You obviously have a kind heart. I did not know that pigeons are doves, or the other facts. Very interesting. Thank you for sharing your story. P.S. I like your hat, too! ;)
Such a beautiful Ode to
Susan Desmarais Oak BluffsSuch a beautiful Ode to Walter.
A wonderful tale of fate. I
Paul Condlin EdgartownA wonderful tale of fate. I would’ve carefully driven around the poor fella and kept going. Too many things I couldn’t do…like touching it for starters. Even if I did, I'd never come close to memorializing the experience quite like this. So, I really appreciate the good Samaritan efforts and your other skills. The ability to weave wit and compassion into a wonderful story. Thanks...
What an uplifting read about
Bob Dusa Oak BluffsWhat an uplifting read about your experience with Walter, a fine feathered friend. You really are the personification of the proverb, "Birds of a feather flock together".
Thank you for letting us know
Gee Gee Barden Oak Bluffs and Porter Ranch, CAThank you for letting us know the follow-up to your wonderful Earth Day essay on how you came to become responsible for Walter's welfare. I was very sad to learn of his passing, but his life was extended and his last days made special because of you. It seems clear that he was grateful.
Regarding your not knowing when you will ever hug someone again, I feel sure that you must be receiving many virtual hugs from those of us who have read your beautiful pieces, and I expect that when this pandemic has finally passed you will be receiving many more in person.
In respect to those whom you have lost - Jennifer, Angus, Mona, and now Walter - I hope that the following quotation, said to be Chinese, may hold resonance for you: "I measure my life by your presence, which your absence does not take away."
A great story from a gifted
Alan Reekie West TisburyA great story from a gifted writer. Barry I apologize profusely for the pigeon pie recipe I sent you when I first read the story online. Now I feel as if I know the wee fella. Rest In Peace Walter and not pastry
A lovely story, beautifully
Eileen West TisburyA lovely story, beautifully told.
Dear Barry: I read your
Colleen Kydd-Sumberg ConnecticutDear Barry: I read your Earth Day story and loved it, especially the part where you went back and saved the pigeon. And I want to thank you for writing your follow-up story about you and Walter. Your compassion and humanity certainly came through in your story. Truth: I actually got a little teary when I found out poor Walter was euthanized. Please keep writing your wonderful stories and definitely consider rescuing a shelter animal or two. Thank you Barry! RIP Walter!
I really enjoyed your tale of
Caroline EdgartownI really enjoyed your tale of sweet empathy and bonding. Amazing that poor creature must have been in so much pain all that time and Walter never let out a peep. Thank you
Best thing i’ve read in two
August West EdgartownBest thing i’ve read in two months. Thank you, Barry.
Exquisite telling of a
Leila ChilmarkExquisite telling of a beautiful tale...what a gift you have,... Walter was a blessing for you and you for him. Thank you for sharing this story with such love and humor at a time we so desperately need both.
Great story, Bro' Hammer. RIP
Keith K St. Paul, MinnesotaGreat story, Bro' Hammer. RIP Walter. You gave him more kindness in his final days than we often give other human beings. Read parts of it to Rio and Carlos who thoroughly enjoyed it as well. Maybe you can adopt one of the famous Vineyard skunks. Would not only keep you company, but as a misanthrope you'd get the added benefit of it driving off other people. Just sayin'
Wonderful article!
Burran McNamee MontanaWonderful article!
I once found a dead pigeon
John Dustman MinneapolisI once found a dead pigeon outside a barber shop in Newark, Delaware as a brand new freshman at the U of D. I thought it was alive at first and approached it thinking it would fly away (I later learned they laced corn with arsenic to "thin the population"). I picked it up and examined the beautiful creature. I wondered if I could use the feathers for tying flies.
I had earlier met a girl that reminded me of Elizabeth Taylor. She was from Bryn Mawr and her father was a CPA for Pink Floyd. She had worked at a vetinarian's office that summer and had a rabbit named Matza Ball in her dorm room.
So I took the pigeon to my second story dorm room and at dinner in the meal-plan cafeteria, I asked her if she could take a look at the "injured" bird. She said she could.
Later that evening we staked a look out and I opened the window in preparation. When I heard she was coming I put the bird out the window with both hands. She came into my room and I said, "just in time, I think it can fly!". I tossed the bird and, like a Monte Python's Flying Circus intro, the pigeon rolled and plummeted to the ground. She was visably upset. Prank backfired. I ran outside, picked it up, stroked it, and announced "It appears to be fine!"
She became a very good friend, including turning me into a lifelong John Prine fan.
I have felt guilty ever since. Your story Barry gives me solace on many levels.
Wish I Was There.
Thanks Barry:
Michael OBThanks Barry:
Lost my parrot last year I had for 27 years.
Still miss him.
Wonderful story.
Dear Barry,
Emily Burlington, VTDear Barry,
Thank you for sharing this extraordinary story of compassion. Your grief is powered by love and that is truly beautiful. Sending a big virtual hug. May you live in joy and May Walter rest in peace.❤️
Barry.. Wow! What a gifted
Ginni Harris Burbridge Anchorage, AKBarry.. Wow! What a gifted writer! The story is so moving and honest; it brought tears to my eyes. I hope that life begins to brighten again for you in the future.
Beautiful, heartfelt story.
Jane Spencer Wilmington, DeBeautiful, heartfelt story. I was afraid to ask you about Walter's outcome. This was a two hankie story. Keep the faith.
Your story captured my
Kathleen Mathews Springfield, OhioYour story captured my attention from the first sentence and I am so happy Walter had a loving hand to soothe him, just as he calmed him.
As a child I also wanted to be a vet and spent a lot of my childhood looking for critters to save. My career path diverted to nursing but the pull to help injured animals never waned. Over the years I rescued birds, baby rabbits and orphaned deer mice but the most rewarding and saddest rescue involved a baby bluejay we named Scraggles. I found him lying in a puddle of rainwater, cold, wet and covered with fleas after a storm. I brought him in the house, gave him a flea soap bath, wrapped him in a towel and placed him on top of the running dryer so he could “pass away” warm and with dignity. Two hours later I unwrapped the towel to find an alert, hungry baby bird who immediately imprinted on me as his new mom.
What a heartwarming and
Nancy Los AngelesWhat a heartwarming and brilliantly written story Barry. You gave Walter a loving peaceful few days.. thank you for caring.
Love this. Please consider
Susan Chicago, IllinoisLove this. Please consider the Angus and Hazel route listed above. Your compassion may have found a new home. ❤️
How did I miss this
Jane TisburyHow did I miss this continuation of the tale of Walter Pigeon? I loved part one and wondered daily what happened...I am still weeping, but what kindness you showed. And it was returned in full by a sweet bird.
Barry, you have a new fan
Harry Seymour Oak BluffsBarry, you have a new fan among many, I'm sure. Loved this!
Barry, you hit a home run
Randy Husbands Wilmington, DEBarry, you hit a home run with the Walter article. I am going to share it with Tri-State Bird & Rescue here in Newark-Hockessin area. They heal birds, hawks, eagles, etc until they can survive again in the wild. I will talk to you on FB soon. I think I found you there one day.
Remember at Forwood Elementary & FJH we played soccer & were both drummers. Sorry for your losses of Jennifer & your dogs & Walter. I too had a fiance die from melanoma in 2014. We were to be married, but postponed it.
Keep writing brother. I remember your & Alex's play, but didn't get to see it. Was it ever recorded?
Ciao, Randy
Hi Barry, I'm on line looking
Stacey Chaffee East Greenwich, RIHi Barry, I'm on line looking for a different column of yours that I really enjoyed (read it at my mom's home on Mother's Day, and want to surprise her with something I plan to do with it). Is there any chance you can email me the gem you wrote recently: "Dark Days Don't Get Me Down"? So much fun to read (and congratulations on your impending nuptials! ;-). Many thanks from a former MV mother's helper, Aquinnah Shop waitress, and new fan of yours.
Barry, this article was the
Jefferson Davis Vineyard HavenBarry, this article was the absolute best thing I have read in such a long time. Your writing is a gift to all of us during these unsettling times. Wow!
What a moving and beautiful
Sig Van Raan West TisburyWhat a moving and beautiful story. I've heard that birds are messengers from the other side and I'm sure Walter was carrying a message from
a deceased loved one - that you will be fine, Barry. This story exemplifies what I see as a post-pandemic consciousness - the recognition that we are all interconnected and interdependent on each other - all species. Barry, your story, your experience touched me deeply.
Thanks for this, Barry. You
Pete Farrelly Ojai, CaliforniaThanks for this, Barry. You're a true artist and a beautiful soul.
What a lovely piece of
Richard Steves Chilmark, Ma.What a lovely piece of writing. It was refreshing and uplifting to witness Barrys compassion and empathy for a critically injured animal. Mr. Stringfellows week long journey attempting to nurse Walter back to health is an exquisite story that is educational, humorous ( "turns out Walter is a Tarintino fan") and poignant, based on Barrys recent loss of a partner and two beloved pets. Thanks for a beautiful piece of writing, hopefully we can look forward to more articles showcasing you writing talent.
While leaving the dry
Cathy Buckingham, Pa.While leaving the dry cleaners I noticed a bird under a bush. I picked it up and brought him home. It was a white dove. I kept him until his wing healed and released him . I called him Whity, not very original , anyway Whity flew off but would roost at dusk on an overhang . I would see him every morning and at night. I got worried he would get cold so I bought a $50.00 bird house . He stayed for two more weeks in his new home but eventually flew away , I hope, to join a flock.
Your story was beautifully written. and thank you for sharing your time with “Walter”.
Best Eulogy I've read. It is
MichaelF Los AngelesBest Eulogy I've read. It is fitting that each brought peace to the other when needing it most. Kudos.
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